Hey guys! I'm sorry for not updating my blog for the past few days :( I know you guys are getting really annoyed by my laziness but this time was because I was away for a church youth retreat. This retreat was called "Freedom" and after going through the camp, I really felt renewed and free. Today, I'll share with you my testimony.
Alright, before the camp started, I went in the camp expecting myself to get back on track with God. I'm sure most of you can tell that I was side-tracking away from the right path. I was vulgar, I was skipping school and I picked up smoking. I did so many fun things with the new friends I made outside of school but looking back, I realised that I did all these things to find some acceptance. The pastor that came to the youth retreat to preach used to be in a situation like mine but much worst. However he said that he did all this as he was looking for some kind of acceptance and it was then when I knew I felt the same way. I know many people will never imagine, even myself, but I figured that I had some problem of acceptance. I always had the problem of finding that acceptance among my friends and I always thought that I will never be excepted for who I was. As a result, I started acting like someone I was not. I was trying to be that girl everyone thought was pretty. I was always changing myself to please people.
However at the camp, everything changed. After the few touching worship sessions with God, I finally heard God's voice after a good 1 month. As I was crying and lying at my seat, I heard God whispering into my ear the sweetest words. It said "No matter what happens, you are my child and I love you for who you are. I loved you because I created you and you don't have to be someone you're not because in my eyes you are my precious princess." At that moment, I started to cry even harder and I felt so comforted and so peaceful. Later that night, the pastor came to pray for all of us and when it was my turn, he said. "Hey, it will be alright, God will be there with you. He'll never let you go. He loves you so much so don't let go of him too." At the point, I was so amazed as those were the exact words I needed to hear. I needed to know that someone was there for me and I knew it was God that was working though the pastor. I knew God heard me and that was all I needed.
As time passed, I started to see things in a different way. I started to realize how much I was missing out. I started to realize that my church friends accepted me for who I was. I started to figure that what I always had been looking for was right in front of me. Lastly, I slowly came to realize that my church friend would not leave like the rest but they will be the ones that hold my hand though the storm. I know it might not seem like anything amazing but this camp really changed my life a lot and now things are slowly getting better. I can feel that things will eventually change. I know that everything I bear will be so much lighter with my friends around me supporting and carrying it for me as well. Now, my heart feels as if it has been lighted up once again and I'm burning with the love and the earn for God. I somehow feel like I re-started my Christian life all over again & I feel as if God is slowly winning my heart back to him. I feel like the relationship between me and God is getting better by the days and I know I'll come to that point where I once used to be. I'll never stop believing because I know God has more to give and show me. I know that God is just waiting for the right time to make everything happen. And most importantly, I know I'm FREE ~
I'll end my testimony here for now but in whatever you do, always remember to pray and seek God for help. He knows the best for you and he'll lead you the path or way to go. Never give up the faith but keep on making it stronger! You know I love you!
XoXo, Kimberley ♥