Friday, 7 February 2014

Heart to Heart: Embracing Your Past


I'm sure everyone will have some moments in your life that you wish you could erase. Hoping that they will all disappear from memory as they were just too painful to remember. 

Those are your scars, your hurt, your pain. 

When people block their emotions out, they do two things. 

1. Self denial 
2. Avoiding of the matter 


Self denial - When a person is in self denial, he/she would refuse to admit to a certain emotion they might be feeling. An example of hurt could have been from a broken relationship before. However, instead of accepting the fact they got hurt, they just wouldn't come to admit that they were. They would in turn keep telling themselves that they're over whatever has happened when they're really not. 

Most if the time, self denial happens when one cannot accept the truth. Or when one is afraid to own up to his/her emotions. There are many reasons as to why people can't come clean with themselves. Some might be because of their pride, while others because of the sudden shock from the event. 


Avoiding the matter - When a person is afraid to face their past, they would avoid talking about it. At times when a "forbidden" event is brought up, you would most probably find them changing the subject. They would then fall into a stage of shame and somehow, all their emotions they felt for that particular event would all come flooding back at that instant. 


I used to be like that. But over the years, I've learnt to embrace my past. I realized that one shouldn't be ashamed of your past. Instead, one should turn all the negativity into positive energy and use this event to grow and learn. It is very important for an individual to understand who or what made them into that individual they see today. Many people focus too much on the bad, missing out the fact that all these scars are actually shaping them in the smallest of ways.

I'm sure people that have been reading my blog constantly would know some of my mistakes. However, because of this, people have also asked me why I decided to post them all out. Exposing myself. My answer to this is simple. I don't see why I should be shy of something I did wrong. Well at least something I did wrong that made me learn the right. Of course, if you want to go against me, you can. However, my point here is about one learning how to embrace their past to make them a stronger person. This blog post is to encourage all those out there that can't let go of something they've been holding on to for a long time. This post is for everyone that is afraid to trust in anything. 

I just want to let people reading this know that it's okay to screw up. It's okay to fall. However, it's definitely not okay to use that fall to define who you are. This shouldn't be how one should live. No one should live in their scars. People need to over look their scars and see that their scars are what makes them beautiful. Their scars are what changed them to the strong person they see when they look into the mirror today. 

So, don't try to forget an event you don't want to to remember. Don't block out the hurt.
Love yourself for you. Past, present and future.
Face it, feel it, understand it, and then overcome it. 


xoxo

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